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Categorie:
bancuri
Inmormantarea unui cardiolog.
Toate erau in forma de inima: florile, coroanele, jerbele, groapa, sicriul.Cand sa bage mortul in groapa, un tip din multime incepe sa rada in hohote. Preotul se opreste din cantat si il intreaba:
-Bine domnule, acum te-a gasit si pe dumneata rasul? Tocmai in acest moment?
Tipul ii raspunde:
-Nu va suparati dar ma gandeam la propria mea inmormantare, pentru ca eu sunt ginecolog!
------
Un tip isi astepta nevasta sa vina acasa. Se face ora zece seara, iar nevasta-sa nu apare. Tipul, enervat:
- Parca vad... Vine acasa si o intreb unde a fost. Iar ea imi raspunde ca a fost la vreun film cu o colega... O bat de-o indoi!
Se face ora unsprezece. Nevasta-sa tot nu aparuse.
- Sa vezi ce-mi povesteste, ca a fost la o aniversare cu colegii si nu si-a dat seama cand a trecut timpul... O calc in picioare!
Ora douasprezece. Nevasta-sa tot nu venise.
- Sigur o sa-mi toarne o poveste, cum ca a fost la o colega la o cafea si nu si-a dat seama cum a trecut timpul... Doamne, o omor in bataie!
Pe la ora unu noaptea apare si nevasta-sa...
- Unde ai fost pana la ora asta?! urla sotul furios.
- Unde sa fiu? Am fost sa fac sex!
- Poftim, uite ce-o intreb eu si ce-mi raspunde ea!
Toate erau in forma de inima: florile, coroanele, jerbele, groapa, sicriul.Cand sa bage mortul in groapa, un tip din multime incepe sa rada in hohote. Preotul se opreste din cantat si il intreaba:
-Bine domnule, acum te-a gasit si pe dumneata rasul? Tocmai in acest moment?
Tipul ii raspunde:
-Nu va suparati dar ma gandeam la propria mea inmormantare, pentru ca eu sunt ginecolog!
------
Un tip isi astepta nevasta sa vina acasa. Se face ora zece seara, iar nevasta-sa nu apare. Tipul, enervat:
- Parca vad... Vine acasa si o intreb unde a fost. Iar ea imi raspunde ca a fost la vreun film cu o colega... O bat de-o indoi!
Se face ora unsprezece. Nevasta-sa tot nu aparuse.
- Sa vezi ce-mi povesteste, ca a fost la o aniversare cu colegii si nu si-a dat seama cand a trecut timpul... O calc in picioare!
Ora douasprezece. Nevasta-sa tot nu venise.
- Sigur o sa-mi toarne o poveste, cum ca a fost la o colega la o cafea si nu si-a dat seama cum a trecut timpul... Doamne, o omor in bataie!
Pe la ora unu noaptea apare si nevasta-sa...
- Unde ai fost pana la ora asta?! urla sotul furios.
- Unde sa fiu? Am fost sa fac sex!
- Poftim, uite ce-o intreb eu si ce-mi raspunde ea!
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Categorie:
d'ale lu' Panda
Cu ocazia implinirii frumoasei varste de 24 de ani, iti urez un sincer la multi ani, multa sanatate si mult succes pe toate planurile. Si ca un reminder de anul trecut... am pus videoclipul de mai sus :d ce vremuri...
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Categorie:
melodia zilei
I got this little kitty about 2 months back
he was the nicest little kitty, now a pain in my crack
This little kitty is a ninja, always stalking my feet
This little kitty is a warrior you know what I mean
he's an evil little kitty look what he did to my hand
tries to get in trouble in any way that he can
I could give this cat a toy, but he'd rather have the wrapper
and I will always give him water, but he still drinks from the crapper
You could lock him in a closet and he just won't care
kitty chews on my shoes and he licks my hair
always scratching on my favorite chair and jumping on the couch
playing in the window sills and tearing through the house
He's so full of energy and easily amused
kitty will attack anything that moves
Causing trouble, starting battles just so he could be a little part of
he's a meanest little kitty so we named him sparta
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
little bitty kitty wanna bite bite bite
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
little bitty kitty wanna bite bite bite
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
little bitty kitty wanna bite bite bite
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
little bitty kitty wanna bite
Where'd you go
are you stalking me?
are you under the couch, quite possibly
ears laid back so you don't get caught
ready to pounce my leg with everything that you got
I know you're probably watching me from across the room
concentrating contemplating on attacking me soon
You're not invisible kitty, I'm gonna find you first
Come out come out before I make things worse
I've seen where you hide and I know where you've been
Hey kitty why don't you give in
Even if you try to sneak up on me, I'm prepared
Cause I've got my safety gear on and I'm not scared
I think I hear a kitty cat under the bed
I know your making noises just to mess with my head
You can stalk me all you want, but I'm not your pray
cause you always seem to find me first, but not today
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
little bitty kitty wanna bite bite bite
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
little bitty kitty wanna bite bite bite
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
little bitty kitty wanna bite bite bite
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
Come on out, I'm gonna get you now
I've got 'em cornered
and now he's mine
He's not gonna get away this time
I'll snatch him up fast before he can blink and then...
Aw man! He's asleep in the sink
What is with this cat? I'm confused
He's got a bed, but it's never been used
In every waking moment, kitty's out for the fight
then [fart] next minute kitty's out like a light
How could I let this creature live inside of my home
I gotta keep an eye on him when I'm on the phone
I'm a little afraid to leave this cat all alone
this kitty may destroy everything that I own
Look at him now, I kinda feel bad
He's the best little cat that I've had
and the one big thing I forgot to mention, was that
He wasn't fighting, he just wanted attention
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
little bitty kitty wanna bite bite bite
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
little bitty kitty wanna bite bite bite
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
little bitty kitty wanna bite bite bite
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
showing love, that's all this kitty does
he was the nicest little kitty, now a pain in my crack
This little kitty is a ninja, always stalking my feet
This little kitty is a warrior you know what I mean
he's an evil little kitty look what he did to my hand
tries to get in trouble in any way that he can
I could give this cat a toy, but he'd rather have the wrapper
and I will always give him water, but he still drinks from the crapper
You could lock him in a closet and he just won't care
kitty chews on my shoes and he licks my hair
always scratching on my favorite chair and jumping on the couch
playing in the window sills and tearing through the house
He's so full of energy and easily amused
kitty will attack anything that moves
Causing trouble, starting battles just so he could be a little part of
he's a meanest little kitty so we named him sparta
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
little bitty kitty wanna bite bite bite
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
little bitty kitty wanna bite bite bite
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
little bitty kitty wanna bite bite bite
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
little bitty kitty wanna bite
Where'd you go
are you stalking me?
are you under the couch, quite possibly
ears laid back so you don't get caught
ready to pounce my leg with everything that you got
I know you're probably watching me from across the room
concentrating contemplating on attacking me soon
You're not invisible kitty, I'm gonna find you first
Come out come out before I make things worse
I've seen where you hide and I know where you've been
Hey kitty why don't you give in
Even if you try to sneak up on me, I'm prepared
Cause I've got my safety gear on and I'm not scared
I think I hear a kitty cat under the bed
I know your making noises just to mess with my head
You can stalk me all you want, but I'm not your pray
cause you always seem to find me first, but not today
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
little bitty kitty wanna bite bite bite
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
little bitty kitty wanna bite bite bite
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
little bitty kitty wanna bite bite bite
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
Come on out, I'm gonna get you now
I've got 'em cornered
and now he's mine
He's not gonna get away this time
I'll snatch him up fast before he can blink and then...
Aw man! He's asleep in the sink
What is with this cat? I'm confused
He's got a bed, but it's never been used
In every waking moment, kitty's out for the fight
then [fart] next minute kitty's out like a light
How could I let this creature live inside of my home
I gotta keep an eye on him when I'm on the phone
I'm a little afraid to leave this cat all alone
this kitty may destroy everything that I own
Look at him now, I kinda feel bad
He's the best little cat that I've had
and the one big thing I forgot to mention, was that
He wasn't fighting, he just wanted attention
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
little bitty kitty wanna bite bite bite
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
little bitty kitty wanna bite bite bite
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
little bitty kitty wanna bite bite bite
Hey little sparta what is with all the fight
showing love, that's all this kitty does
credits to Mihu
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